


But Was He Yours If He Wanted Me So Bad?

by BumbleBeeDoll



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff, Jealousy, Kissing, M/M, Ocelot knows the truth and Kaz does not, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-21 03:02:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11348514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BumbleBeeDoll/pseuds/BumbleBeeDoll
Summary: He had gotten Kaz to stop working altogether which was usually impossible."Are they... really together?" He grumbled out eventually and Ocelot responded with a slow nod.Ocelot was just expecting some fun to come from this.Not Kaz shoving their entire day's work off the desk they currently shared and making a mess of his office before storming out.--Ocelot makes an off-hand comment about Venom and Quiet's new relationship, not realizing Kaz didn't know. It turns to them relying on each other and taking their sort-of-not-really friends with benefits status to the next level.





	But Was He Yours If He Wanted Me So Bad?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SailorStarDust1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorStarDust1/gifts).



> This fanfic is for the lovely SailorStarDust1! She had requested a comparison fic with OcelHira and VQuiet with some salty Kaz, I sorta took the idea and ran with it so I hope you enjoy it!!  
> I was going to add smut but I couldn't find a good spot to put it but there is a tiny nod to my VQuiet smut fic Shower Stall Shenanigans :) (Which will be getting a second chapter sometime soon!)

"What do you mean they're _together_?"  

Kaz had just posed this question to Ocelot as they signed paperwork together in Kaz's office. The piles of work were more than double than usual so the two decided to bunker down and get it done together. Ocelot had made an off hand comment which had brought Kaz's pen to a screeching halt though. 

"How did you not know, Miller?" Ocelot asked him, his classic snark in his tone and a light smirk now spreading across his cat-like features as he continued to focus on his work and not look up towards Kaz. His posture was much more relaxed compared to Kaz's now rigid form at the new information he had just been presented. 

Snake and Quiet... _Together?!_  

His mind was racing a mile a minute, trying to comprehend this whole situation.  

How could Snake do this?  

With _her_?  

Was he fucking dreaming or some shit? Ocelot had to be fucking with him, there was absolutely _no way._  

Ocelot kept working on his paperwork and refused to look back up at him though. Usually, when he was messing around he'd at least glance up to see Kaz's absurd expressions since they were typically golden. That was the typical Ocelot move due to the man getting his kicks from teasing the younger of the two but it wasn't happening. This was making Kaz nervous that he was actually being serious. 

How was he supposed to feel about this? Snake in a relationship with _that woman_?  

How was he supposed to feel about him being in a relationship at all? 

Kaz sat back in his chair and stared at his desk, pen clicking repeatedly in hand.  

Ocelot finally looked up at him with his eyebrow quirked, clearly not expecting it to hit him _this_ hard. He was completely aware of how Kaz felt toward their boss but he was also fully aware of how Kaz would take that need every so often and direct it towards him.  

Ocelot had his own feelings for Big Boss but buried those quite deep within himself since he knew they'd never become anything more than what they already were. Besides, their boss here wasn't his true boss anyhow, but with the use of hypnotherapy on himself, that knowledge would melt away for the time being until he needed to do it again. When his mind was momentarily clear with the truth, he sometimes wondered if Kaz had any idea. Perhaps he did but didn't want to believe it and lived out the lie too? Or maybe he was completely oblivious and thought that their boss had just changed slightly. 

He did know that Kaz came to him because he was lonely and needed someone to take his romantic frustrations out on. It had happened one evening of signing paperwork just like this and now Ocelot would indulge him in make-out sessions late at night and sometimes a grab here or there. 

Did he do it because he was lonely too?  

Maybe. 

He'd never admit it though.  

During work hours though they were all business and tending towards their boss. It wasn't like they didn't talk to each other and the two weren't really sure how they felt towards each other. They definitely disagreed quite a bit on all sorts of matters but they'd still be able to share an actual conversation here and there. 

Kaz was still in the present moment clicking away with the pen in his hand, his brow tense and Ocelot thought for a moment he may have broken him. 

"You gonna be alright, Miller?" He asked him and telling himself inwardly that he should not be surprised one bit by this fit of drama Kaz was doing right now but he still didn't think he'd react like _this_. He figured he'd shout for a bit and then fume silently while he finished their paperwork. Maybe even confront Snake afterward when he got back from his current mission.  

He had gotten Kaz to stop working altogether which was usually impossible.  

"Are they... really together?" He grumbled out eventually and Ocelot responded with a slow nod. 

Ocelot was just expecting some fun to come from this. 

Not Kaz shoving their entire day's work off the desk they currently shared and making a mess of his office before storming out. 

\--- 

The Seychelles heat was unforgiving today, the sun unbearably strong and Quiet was loving every moment of it. She soaked up the rays of sun on while laying on her cot and humming along to the music playing in her cell.  

Above her, she heard a helicopter approaching. 

_His_ helicopter. 

He was going to be landing at the Medical platform. That either meant he was going to be visiting her or he had injured himself. Hoping it was the former, she sat up on her cot and rested her back against the bars. The helicopter soon landed and she heard DD barking happily so she assumed he must be alright.  

As of late Quiet and Venom had been an inseparable team, working through missions together in a silent agreement.  

Things had taken a different turn though in their professional relationship when he kissed her out in the field one night.  

The two had been lying together for warmth and he had given her a quick kiss on the lips. It wasn't like this had come completely out of nowhere, the two had been flirting with each other in the ACC and in between missions but she wasn't sure if it was ever going to go anywhere.  

She had laid there for a moment, staring at him and him staring back at her, an uncertain expression on his face like he had just fucked up and it made her smile. Quiet had never expected him to pull such a bold move but it made her ecstatic. She had kissed him back and since that night the two had developed a romantic relationship together.  

They'd lounge in her cell together or lay out in the sun on one of the roofs of the many buildings on Mother Base when they had the down time to do so. She had started to sit next to him in the ACC and they'd switch between resting against each other or just simply holding hands. 

As cliché as it sounds, Quiet felt like a school girl in love for the first time but she was still finding herself getting used to their intimate moments. It wasn't like they were all over each other constantly, but him kissing her when departing from each other was still new and it made her stomach turn. Before coming here, romantic relationships were not something she had let into her life. All of her focus was put into her training and her missions she was assigned. Almost like a machine, Quiet would fulfill her duties and return back to her boss to be sent back out once again. 

Coming here to Mother Base had made her change. At first, she resisted it, stewing in her want for revenge and ignoring the man known as Big Boss. Then he brought her some music tapes for her cell one night and it had confused her. Even though she was his prisoner and she was a part of XOF, he still showed her compassion. He had brought her those tapes because he thought she could do with some new music to help with her boredom. After that first night, he'd visit her cell every so often to either get some time away from everybody or to give her a new tape.  

He had definitely caught her interest and she decided she wanted to go out on missions with him to really see what this 'legend' was like. Since their first mission together, the two had been the ultimate team on Mother Base and her feelings towards him had grown. He treated her like a person and not a weapon, which was for the first time in her life that anyone had done that. 

Now Big Boss and Quiet the Sniper were not just a team on the field but also a team in their personal lives. 

It excited her and made her happy but there was a part of her still uncertain about the two of them.  

It was pretty fair to say that most of Mother Base hated her so if the news ever fully came out that she was now making out with their Boss, who knows how it'd affect things on base. It would probably drop morale and could affect his relationships with Kaz and Ocelot.  

She wasn't an idiot, she noticed the ways the two men looked at their boss. She didn't know to the fullest extent of what kind of backgrounds the men all shared together but it seemed Kaz was a lot more attached than Ocelot.  

Or at least Kaz showed it more.  

Ocelot was a bit odd when it came to Venom. She noted how some days when Venom was on base that he'd always be with him and just giving him a certain look and some days he said what he needed to and went on his way.  

Kaz, even with his near constant working, wanted to be with Venom as much as he could be. Typically Venom would spend the afternoon in Kaz's office with him, and sometimes Ocelot, going over every detail of plans for Mother Base and new missions. With Mother Base growing as rapidly as it was, Quiet could see the workload that came with it.  

Quiet figured that Ocelot must be aware of their relationship by now since the man seemed to know everything that happened on this base but she wondered if Kaz had any idea. Quiet tried to keep things civil with Kaz but when he disrespected her almost every time he saw her, it definitely made things difficult.  

If he were to ever find out how would he react? 

_He'd probably scream bloody fucking murder..._ Quiet thought to herself with a smirk on her face. 

"What are you smiling about?"  

Quiet heard Venom's typical grumble next to her and turned her head to see him standing at the base of the stairs of her cell, arms folded and a smirk on his own face. Standing silently as always, Quiet cloaked and reappeared in front of him a few seconds later. The fact that she could be truly "free" when he was here was definitely a plus from their new relationship. No one was going to go against their boss on the matter. 

She placed a gentle kiss on his sweat covered forehead and he relaxed under her touch, unfolding his arms to wrap them around her. 

_Nothing important._  

\--- 

With his flesh arm around her shoulders, Venom and Quiet were now seated on her cot, enjoying the Seychelles heat together. 

Well, Quiet more so than Venom. 

Venom was doing Mother Base work on his iDroid with his free hand while Quiet absentmindedly kicked her feet to the music playing in her cell.  

It was nice to be with him again.  

He had taken DD on his last few missions, nothing huge, to spend time with his animal companion. The two soldiers had spent so much time together that DD felt like he was getting neglected by his master so Venom brought only him on his missions to make DD happy again.  

Quiet didn't mind one bit and understood completely but she was still happy to have the man to herself again. 

That was until she heard the sound of spurs on her stairs down to her cell. 

The two quickly separated and tried to look casual as Ocelot made his way down the stairs and over to her cell. 

"Please, don't even try." He drawled out, amusement clear on his face as he looked over the two, arms now crossed. "If you seriously thought I didn't know about the two of you, then you clearly don't know me and I'm slightly offended." He lightly chuckled out, a small half smile on his face.  

"Didn't think we made it that obvious." Venom grumbled out, putting his iDroid away and standing up. If Ocelot came here, there was always a reason why and it usually ended up him having to take Venom away for intel meetings. 

"You didn't really. Anyone could think you two are just good buddies spending time together." Ocelot replied and Venom nodded his head. "But do remember, I know _everything_ that happens on this base." Ocelot replied slowly and cooly, his tone now stern as he looked directly down upon Quiet still sitting on her cot. She frowned at him up at him, not happy with the way he was speaking to her. 

_Is that supposed to be a threat? I thought we were past the passive aggressive_ _hosti_ _lity_ _, Ocelot._ She thought to herself and brushed off his comment that Venom seemed to completely overlook due to not looking at the two of them as he adjusted his gear.  

_Don't take it out on me that he chose me over you_ _and_ _Miller_ _._  

\--- 

The two men had left Quiet's cell together, Venom being correct in assuming that he was needed for a meeting. Venom hadn't noticed the tension between Ocelot and Quiet back at the cell but he could now definitely sense that something was off with the man.  

Ocelot kept his pace even as they headed towards the room kept only for the highest in command to meet in. He could tell by Quiet's expression that his words had gotten through to her. He didn't necessarily mean it as a threat, just that if she tried anything he'd know about it instantly. The two had formed a friendship together but that didn't mean Ocelot fully trusted that woman. He didn't expect her to just kill the boss in plain sight, but he needed to be ready if she did anything out of order. 

Brushing that thought out of his mind, Ocelot brought his focus back to the matter at hand. Venom was about to enter a room with a still very angry Kaz in it. Whether or not Kaz would say anything was still in the air and he wouldn't know until the two walked in. Ocelot hoped Kaz would keep his mouth shut, at least at first so they could get their business done.  

Then once Ocelot left, Kaz could voice his aggressions towards their boss.  

Usually, Ocelot could ignore the other man's harpings but this was something he didn't want or need to be a part of. The thought of the relationship that John, _his_ John, and Kaz had back at the original Mother Base brought a deep frown across his cat-like features. 

_We're all in some sort of fucked up_ _polyamorous_ _situation. The love he has_ _for_ _John and the love I have for_ _John_ _too. And the way Miller and I are now some sort of_ _friends with benefits? Then add_ _to the mix_ _Venom-_  

 

 

**_No._**  

 

 

 

**_2+2=5_**  

 

 

 

 

_Yes. The three of us are all sorts of fucked up now, aren't we?_ _Snake_ _, Miller and myself. Not that it's_ _a bad thing._ _I can't deny that I have a liking towards Miller now._ _Perhaps the three of us could be one someday. Although I don't like sharing all that much._  

\--- 

To Ocelot's surprise, the meeting had gone off as it should've and Kaz had left without saying a word to Venom about his new relationship with Quiet. The three men went their separate ways for the evening but Ocelot knew this wasn't the end of this. 

\--- 

It had been two weeks since Kaz had learned about Snake and Quiet's relationship and he was doing everything he could to not let it cloud his mind. Diamond Dogs had a million other matters that needed his attention so he truly didn't have the time to think about such things. It had struck a chord deep within him but he wasn't about to crumble from it.  

He refused to. 

He'd never. 

...Right? 

Shaking his head, Kaz made his way across the Medical platform to make his rounds to check up on the sick and wounded soldiers. It was another part he played as the XO here on Mother Base. He knew Venom did it too but that was only when he was here and he had the time to before he was sent off again.  

Rounding the corner, he saw Snake making his way towards the shower stall, bloody head to toe. Kaz figured he'd say hello to him before he was off again but stopped when he heard what was definitely a female laugh. 

_Quiet's_ laugh. 

He could make out that Snake the way was holding open the door that it was as if someone was going in before him. Snake stepped inside, never even noticing Kaz standing there, and closed the door and Kaz felt bile rise into his throat. 

\--- 

The sky above was pitch black and Ocelot was returning to his quarters to rest for a few hours before getting back to work. The workload Kaz and him shared never seemed to end but he was willing to do it, even to the end of his days. Anything for Snake.  

Suppressing a yawn, he opened the door to his room and stood still at the sight before him.  

Kaz was here.  

He was seated at Ocelot's desk with his head down, buried into the crook of his elbow. 

Ocelot slowly walked in, the door shutting behind him and thought about how he should go about this.  

Was he angry? Was he upset? 

By his body language, Kaz clearly wasn’t here for a laugh. 

Ocelot rounded his desk and stood next to Kaz, sighing inwardly. As he placed a hand on Kaz's shoulder, he wasn't surprised in the slightest when the younger man jerked his shoulder back to get him to stop. 

"Leave me be..." He heard Kaz growl out. Ocelot dropped his hand to his side and tried to resist rolling his eyes. 

"And you do realize that this is _my_ room you're sulking in?" Ocelot tried to keep his tone even, not wanting to start an argument with him. He just wanted to take a quick nap before getting back to work but that didn't seem like it was going to happen anytime soon. Not with this attitude Kaz was exuding.  

Even though what he was saying was the opposite, Kaz clearly needed some sort of comfort right now. 

He wouldn't have come to Ocelot's room otherwise. 

"It's not right." That was the only response he had gotten from the blonde after a few moments of silence. 

"That's not for you to say, Miller. If he's happy, then it is right." 

"No!" The sudden outburst still didn't surprise Ocelot and he merely stepped to the side when Kaz kicked back out of his chair, knocking it to the ground. His hand slammed onto the desk as he steadied himself and kept himself up. Seeing his face now, Ocelot noticed that his sunglasses were actually off.  

Even with his eyes reduced to milky white orbs, the emotion in his eyes wasn't deniable.  

The rage, the sadness. 

Ocelot kept his stare to Kaz's eyes and watched him closely, studying him to see what he would do next.  

"Everything that Snake and I built back in the 70s in gone! Now he's gone too! He seems to have forgotten everything we had together, the nights we had together..." Kaz was shouting now, his voice cracking at the end of his sentence.  "He's now off with that woman, a woman who was with XOF, the organization that took everything away from us!" 

"Kaz-" Ocelot tried to start but Kaz just shoved him or had tried to and he ended up just falling against Ocelot.  

"How the hell am I supposed to feel about that?!" Kaz was near screaming and Ocelot helped him stand upright. He gripped him tightly on his shoulders and stared him down, his own blood rising. 

"And how am I supposed to feel about you using me to get over him?" 

Kaz looked away from him and gritted his teeth, his face blotchy red and his eyes watery. Ocelot shook his shoulders trying to get him to look back at him. 

"Huh? How I supposed to feel about that?" Ocelot was having a hard time not shouting back at him but he knew if he wanted to get anywhere with this, at least one of them had to have a calm mind. "It's not just you who had a relationship with the boss. You think I don't feel loss either? And now I have you who comes crawling to me whenever you feel sorry for yourself."  

Kaz was now trying to pull away from him but Ocelot kept his grip firm. Silence had filled Ocelot's quarters and Kaz was still refusing to look at him. He kept his gaze firm on the desk next to them. Ocelot knew he was being harsh and that Kaz had more than likely had just wanted to be coddled but these words needed to be said. Ocelot took in a deep breath and attempted to calm himself before he really started to go in too deep.  

"I've lost him..." Kaz whispered out, still keeping his stare on the desk, seemingly having no interest in responding to Ocelot's words. 

"In a sense yes, but not entirely," Ocelot responded. "You may not be the one he holds at night, just the same as me, but it doesn't mean he has abandoned you or me." Ocelot was hoping he could get through to the man without yelling but he could tell Kaz was starting to disassociate and wallow in his depression. 

"I've lost him," Kaz repeated and Ocelot gripped him tighter by the shoulders.  

"And now you have me," 

Finally looking towards Ocelot, Kaz saw the same emotions he was feeling in his eyes too. The usually cold, stern and mysterious grey eyes were actually showing emotion for once. It was making Kaz feel uncomfortable, not used to this in the slightest. 

_If harsh truth doesn't work then maybe this will._  Ocelot thought to himself before continuing with his sentence. 

"You may not have him anymore, at least for now, but you have me. And I have you." Ocelot stated and it made Kaz's breath hitch just before Ocelot leaned in to kiss him harshly on the lips. Kaz was shocked for a moment but quickly returned the kiss. His mind was swimming, completely confused by this. One moment Ocelot was ripping him a new one and now he's kissing him. 

_I can never keep up with this one._ He thought to himself as the two continued their kiss. Ocelot pulled away first and kept his hands firm still on Kaz's shoulders. 

Ocelot's gaze was piercing as ever. 

"Until the time comes that we get him back, we have each other." Ocelot whispered, his face still close to his. Responding with a nod, Kaz returned his breathing to normal. 

"What if that day never comes?" 

"Trust me, it will," 

Another nod. 

"And then Snake will be all ours." 

Kaz smirked at Ocelot's words and Ocelot grinned back at him and kissed the younger man again. Kaz gripped onto his shirt, holding onto the feeling of being loved again. If that was even the word to use here.  

Was it love? 

Maybe, maybe not.  

He knew their relationship wouldn't change much, they'd still argue and bicker. They'd never fully be like Snake and Quiet, but that was their relationship and this was his and Ocelot's. With Ocelot now emotionally at his side, it relieved him slightly of the pain he was feeling. In all honesty, he didn't think it ever could fully go away and he felt like Ocelot knew that too and probably was even feeling the same. 

"Don't expect me to act like a romantic, though." Ocelot said to him after breaking away again, his usual snark back and it put Kaz a little more at ease, making a grin spread across his features. 

"It'd be weird if you did." 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope it was enjoyable!  
> [MGS Tumblr is pudgyvenomsnake.tumblr.com!]


End file.
